DO YOU REMEMBER THAT TIME IN SEPTEMBER

Southern, Not Southern
I've already kind of established the Oklahoma state of things. It's kind of southern, but not 100%. Other southern states kind of sneer at OK; it's like the red-headed step-child of the south. Yes and no. But Okies are pretty certain that they ARE southern. In fact, they go to extraordinary lengths to convince the rest of the world - in particular the southern part - that they are through-and-through southern.

I have tried to be a fairly "when in Rome" sort of person, trying to fit into the strange spaces of my 5-years-new part of the U.S. However, I do draw the line at certain things. So, in the interest of this cultural expansion of mine, here are my Southern Dos and Don'ts:

Southern Do's

"Y'all." It just comes; it's nearly impossible to fight. It's soft and unintrusive and very warm and welcoming, for the most part. Besides, I couldn't really mock it after I heard a native Okie mock the California "Dude." That sounded undeniably moronic and I had no defense. Note, however, that I don't do "All Y'all". There, my California comes out and it's "you guys." Neither sound terrific; maybe I need to move to another dialectic region.
"Bless Your/Her/His/Their Heart". This phrase, as of late, has taken on a negative connotation, wishing ill will while sounding sympathetic and kind. However, I've heard people use the phrase meaning nothing but the best. I've said it, unconsciously, meaning the better one, but afterwards felt uncomfortable. What if they thought I meant it the mean way?
Dr. Pepper. To be honest, I was raised on DP (and Squirt), so I had no issues joining in the DP love that abounds all throughout the state. Chain food establishments that would normally not offer it (sometimes proffering the terrible replacement, Mr. Pibb), all carry it here. A lot of people think Coke is a Southern thing, but not in OK. We're next door to Texas, and our southern cousins there practically insert DP in I.V.s! I call it the Elixir of Life. I have yet to have a native refute me!

Not Southern

Fried foods. Seriously, they fry everything here. Fried pickles, fried pies, chicken-fried bacon, fried okra, etc. Okra, by the way, is the worst. And, it's the thing that is easiest to grow in the OK garden. Go figure. The chicken-fried aspect of frying is also very popular here. No can do. My stomach just hurts thinking about it.
Sweet tea. Also known as iced tea to the rest of the world, this is as popular, if not more so, than DP. This is a no-brainer, though. Word of Wisdom. Easy choice. It's boiled, then chilled, grass water anyway. Yuck!
Bib overalls. Maybe it's more of a out-in-the-country, farmer fashion. But I wouldn't use the word fashion here. It's terrible, with a shirt, and the stuff of nightmares without it!
Cowboy hats, boots, and giant belt-buckles. Buckles - like I want anyone paying a lot of attention to my middle section. I don't look good in hats and cowboy hats make me feel just a little like an interloper and a fake. Cowboy boots look funny and they're the most uncomfortable footwear someone with plantar fasciatus, high arches and toes that don't want to be scrunched can bear.
Football. I'm just not a sports person. But around here, local and college football are HUGE. Everyone either supports OU or OSU and never the twain shall mix! Don't get in a debate with the two, either, it can get bloody.
Camo, hunting, and dogs. I think it's just a matter of where I was raised; I've never handled a gun. Analiese is allergic to dogs. Plus, camo is just plain ugly, as is the orange safety gear they make you wear with it - ouch! My eyes! Include fishing here, too.

Maybe Southern

Pecans. Since they're everywhere. I like them. I make pies. I use them in cooking. Waste not, want not.
Lousy parking. NOT A VIRTUE. But people here are the worst at parking. When I do a lousy job myself I wonder if I should be proud that I'm fitting in or embarrassed because surely I know better. Parking can get pretty creative.

You say it's my birthday?

Yeah, yeah, yeah. Wednesday was my birthday. What? How rude...you never ask a lady how old she is! Very funny, I do TOO look like a lady!

I made my birthday cake Sunday afternoon because Ken was sick. He did the frosting on Monday, though. I was trying out a new Pinterest recipe. It bombed. The cake was dense and heavy, like a pound cake and the frosting was overwhelming.

Fred did not care for the cake, either.

It had 4 1/2 sticks of butter plus four 7 oz. cups of marshmallow fluff. Not repeatable.

We had my birthday dinner Monday since that was when everyone would be around. Ken put a beef roast in the crockpot and we had it shredded on onion rolls. Yum! My favorite! We don't have that sort of thing very often because beef is outrageously expensive.

I got some facial mask things from Ken and a squishy (think stress ball) elephant from Analiese.

I've named him Fred. Analiese said he was for all the good memories. He is funny and I use him to make memes to remind my Seminary kids to do things.

Gotta love Fred!

Jonathan's gift came later in the week, since he'd ordered it online. It's a new apron. I haven't had one in years and the old one is falling apart. I was glad to get it!

I got rid of - excuse me, shared - more of my cake at Seminary Wednesday morning. Some ate it, some didn't. I told them it didn't hurt my feelings. I told the sister missionaries the same thing on Friday when they came to dinner. I only ever had that one piece on Monday.

I have a little birthday outing planned for Saturday, the 29th, that I'll tell you about later!

Trying not to hit things

It's not a matter of getting old. It's a matter of critters and people being in places they shouldn't! The squirrels have all gone crazy Kamikaze, running around collecting nuts and acorns. Coming home from Church on Sunday, we nearly ran over three!

Then there are the neighborhood dogs. Some are strays, some aren't. I'm so tempted to take off all of their collars and call animal control. There are two in particular who like to chase cars, a certain death sentence. I found the owner for one, but I wanted to tell her she needed to keep her dog locked up in the yard. That is, if she didn't want a flat dog.

And she was parked cross ways in the street yesterday. With her car door open. Trying to convince said yippy little Chihuahua dog (Tiny) to get in her vehicle, when he obviously wanted to chase my van. She had to move her car so I could get through. Not even telling you what went and is going through my mind. I think humans are the worst of the street creatures to deal with, and the most dangerous!

Party Time!

Saturday evening, in Blanchard, at the ward there, was a dance party. They had invited some wards and our branch to come. Analiese, who LOVES to dance, really wanted to go and I thought it would be fun to go as a family. Blanchard lies between us and Norman, closer to Norman. It was a 30 minute drive.

The bishop's wife there was with me in the cabin at Girls Camp. She was so excited to see me there. I also saw a few Seminary students, current and last year. We have a pregnant sister in our branch who was there with her husband and kids. She's not due until February, but she was dancing like she was two weeks late!

And yes, we danced. I got to dance with my husband and son during slow songs, and with my daughter for the fun ones. That is, when I wasn't tuckered completely out! She hardly ever stopped; but she had a good time!